I've been getting constant messages on my YouTube channel from a fellow who keeps asking me slightly differently worded variations on the same question: "What cologne do women find the sexiest?"
I told him that's like asking "What is women's favorite food?", but he won't be satisfied. Here's the latest from him:
"Would you prefer Cool Water or Green Irish Tweed?"
I don't f*#king know! Tell me, Dan. Which would I prefer? Cool Water is a Calone-stuffed thing that is perceived as a dated cliche, and Green Irish Tweed is a well-made but conservative thing that smells like a posher Cool Water. Help.
“Cool Water versus Green Irish Tweed” is a constant source of discussion on Basenotes. They were both (allegedly) created by Pierre Bourdon (Creed keeps its perfumers' names a secret -- yet another lame-ass thing about Creed) and I guess they smell similarly. I sampled them fifteen years apart so I can't say. But I remember I liked neither.
Yes, Cool Water is dated and cliched, except guys who wear stuff like that never understand those concepts. It's one of those '80s crap ozone scents that smells like some 24-year-old former frat dick who used to date-rape, and now he's making $35,000 a year working as a low-level media planner at a second-rate ad agency. And thinking about how great his life was three years ago.
Green Irish Tweed is for the same guy, ten years on, married and desperate and now making $70,000 a year at the same second-rate agency, but he's topped out career-wise, plus he has to work weekends. Which is fine because there's so much tension at home, he can't bear to be there. Oh, and he's thinking about how great his life was ten years ago.
There. Send that to your correspondent. And tell him to find his soul.
Wow, where did this sudden hostility come from? You know I'm only joking. I love everyone.