Perfume Pen Pals: Demeter Lobster



Katie,

I'm wearing Demeter Lobster. I was bored with all my perfumes and so I impulsively bought a bunch of crap and this is like what happens when your relationship is stagnant and you pursue a random person in a bar and then feel a hundred times worse about everything. Lobster is as random as it gets and right now I smell like regret.

It's a light, brine-y scent, not unpleasant but also not lobster-like. Not that I'm complaining. Though maybe I should complain because why wouldn't I want a perfume called "Lobster" to smell like lobster? Then again why would I want it to smell like lobster? Either way, what am I thinking?

Lobster hotline: for use only in perfume emergencies.

It reminds me of buying one of those submarines from the back of a comic book because the ad said it shoots real nuclear torpedoes. Except if it did shoot real nuclear torpedoes, my neighbors would be dead, my mom would be furious, my submarine would be locked away in a closet, and I'd probably be grounded for a whole month. But when the submarine arrives and it's cardboard in the vague shape of a submarine and the nuclear torpedo launcher only launches rubber bands, it's profoundly disappointing. I don't want to kill my neighbors but I also don't want to feel like a sucker. Sometimes life gives us no good options.



So today I'm wearing Lobster. Though I don't smell like lobster. And I feel deep regret. Who says perfume is frivolous?

Dan


Comic book ad via

9 comments:

  1. Dan - it could be worse:

    You could be wearing Demeter Bunk Sock, Demeter Fridge Moss or Demeter Corpse Flower right now.

    Next time, just soothe your nerves with a quick flyover of The Perfumed Court.

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  2. What a scream...are you for real, Dan?

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  3. Assuming your question isn't rhetorical, Beauty Box, I'm indeed real, often uncomfortably real.

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    Replies
    1. I think you're too good to be real, Dan.

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    2. Dear Dan- I am a fairly new follower to Katie and the world of fumeheads- could you pretty please do a complete list of your fragrances for me? I would love it! I am compiling a "best of the best" list and I think you and Katie are my new gurus of scent. Thank you so very much!!
      -Susan (greeneyes6510@gmail.com if you want to send it. I would so appreciate it.)

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    3. Hi Susan, from what I remember, Dan has upwards of a couple hundred bottles of perfume, and many of them he has for their freak value rather than for the fact that they're the best of the best. A list from him might steer you down a strange path. Although he might not agree with me!

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  4. Oh poor Dan. Sorry to hear you were feeling so low. On the upside, I liked that you wrote about being a child with a submarine. Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't Demeter have a crayon scent. Are you up for so e art therapy? I sure am....

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  5. Pink ProvocateurJanuary 03, 2013 9:31 AM

    Art therapy? Do you mean like... we pour different perfumes and paint and glitter on ourselves, and then roll around on fragrance sample papers, and then try to assemble scented pictures of each other? I'm *in*!! ;-)

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    Replies
    1. PP, that sounds ever so complicated...but fun!

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