I love “Cute With Chris”. CWC is the YouTube channel hosted by Chris Leavins, a scruffily scrumptious Canadian fellow who mocks photos of viewers’ pets and gets into arguments with their owners. He is absurd and angry and hilarious, like a birthday party clown trapped by his own success in a job he despises. As my friend Amy likes to say, “A man in pain is so attractive.”
A few weeks ago, Chris was in Los Angeles doing a reading of his short stories - sardonic looks at his unintentionally banal life, à la David Sedaris. It was another installment of “The Chris Leavins Story Hour”, a podcast series that’s currently in iTunes’ top ten. I was in the audience, eager to see Chris demo his wordsmithery. OK, I’ll admit it. I was eager to see Chris, period. Kitties, stories, angry, sensitive -- as long as it’s served up with a creamy coating of Chris, I’m there with a spoon.
I’d been test-driving Manoumalia all afternoon, pondering its triple-X blend of sweaty tropical blooms. One pump of this LesNez eau de toilette conjures “Florals Gone Wild”, complete with sand in their G-strings. So there I was, addled by my Manoumalia-scented body heat, eyeballing Chris in his “Mad Men” suit as he read...to me...alone...on a Polynesian beach. Oh Chris...oh Chris...uh, Chris? Why are you wearing a “Mad Men” suit on our Polynesian beach?